例文和翻译在最后，想先读原文的可以直接跳过。
木心说，修改文句的过程是个欲仙欲死的过程。文书修改润色需要全情投入，的确非常花精力、考水平。然而，很多人并不知道的是，在这之前，思考文书写什么、怎么写，其实也一直都让人叫苦连天。
不论是被一些宣传误导，还对自己背景不够自信，不少的家长和同学，一心想要在文书上发力，不是要让招生官看到自己多优秀，就是要把他们感动得热泪盈眶。
只是，劲力憋得越大，发力反而越难。所以就有了这样的现象：构思主题时深信不疑，动笔写作时半信半疑，写完文书后自我怀疑。
究其原因，还是自己的素材，写作的水平，字数的限制等让内容无法支撑起想要的宏大叙事，或者，惊人之举。今天分享的这篇文书，作者把思考和尝试“文书写什么、怎样写”的过程写了出来，成就了一篇关于写一篇文书的文书。
有趣的是，这个选题，有同学认为非常特别、有创意；而有同学觉得太随意：“这样也行？”不论是创意还是随意，我们看看它为何会成为一篇优秀文书。
引人注目的开头。前两段描写了学生眼中的大学申请文书，以及他们理想中和实际上的应对方式。在那个稍有夸张而不乏幽默的口吻中，作者不仅告诉了招生官自己对文书的了解和重视，也成功的激起了他们往下读的意愿。
三四段用上了文书中典型的展示技巧。
表面上是妈妈和朋友在给建议，实则是告诉招生官自己的背景经历和特长爱好：9岁来到美国，英语从头学起，热爱中国文化，学习8年扬琴，乐队副指挥。
不到一百字，信息量巨大。五六段写研究申请文书选集的经历，也很巧妙。它既是“写一篇关于写一篇文书的文书”的一部分，又是在借机告诉招生官自己对传统文书的了解和尝试——虽然好，但不适合自己。Dramatic这个关键词，恰到好处。
第七段，顿悟。
有了前面铺垫，加上自己动笔（注意，动笔非常重要，光听光看光想是不够的），终于懂得了，文书不是写自传，而是做自己。用个比喻（正如功能各异的细胞聚集在一起…）也要炫一下生物，作者很有心。
结尾很俏皮。
借个人广告当挡箭牌，强行给招生官介绍自己的外貌和特长爱好。最后一句“哎呀搞错了”，让这种“交友个人介绍”不仅不尴尬，还恰如其分的融入到全篇内容，符合作者幽默风趣的个人形象。
以下是例文和翻译：A senior’s worst fear: the dreaded college essay. You can even call it the bane of my existence. But that’s too dramatic. And dramatic is bad, so I’m told. Yet, the significance of these five hundred words cannot be denied. As one admission officer kindly informed me, “Your essay can make or break your application for you. Write it wisely.” No pressure.
高三学生最大的恐惧:可怕的大学申请论文。你甚至可以说它是我存在的祸根。但这样说太戏剧性了。有人告诉我，戏剧性是不好的。然而，这五百字的意义是不容否认的。正如一位招生官善意地告诉我的那样，“你的论文可以决定你申请的成败。明智地写，” 没有压力。
I panicked. I dreamed of sitting down in front of my laptop on some sunny, bright afternoon, clacking out an essay on the keyboard. After all, the college essay is just a sample of my writing, right? Instead, I frantically ran around asking for advice from friends and family, sort of like a startled rat in a maze, but not nearly as furry.
我惊慌失措。我梦想着在某个阳光明媚的下午，坐在笔记本电脑前，在键盘上敲出一篇文章。毕竟，大学申请论文只是我写作的一个样本，对吧?相反，我疯狂地跑来跑去，向朋友和家人寻求建议，有点像迷宫里受惊的老鼠，只是还没有那么凌乱。
“Write about a once-in-a-lifetime experience. Describe how you came from China just before turning nine, knowing nothing but the alphabet, and proceeded to conquer the English language,” my mom suggested. “Be sure to include how this difficult obstacle has shaped you and given you determination and confidence to succeed in your endeavours,” she added.
“写下一生一次的经历。描述一下你是如何在九岁之前从中国来的，除了字母表什么都不懂，然后开始征服英语的，”我妈妈建议道。她补充说:“一定要写这个困境如何塑造了你，给了你决心和信心，让你在努力中取得成功。”
“Colleges like continuity. Show the college your passion for Chinese culture and music through you eight years of playing the Chinese hammered dulcimer,” said a friend over ice cream. “You are second chair in your orchestra, aren’t you?”
“大学喜欢连续性。通过你8年的中国扬琴演奏，向学校展示你对中国文化和音乐的热情。” 一位朋友一边吃着冰淇淋一边说: “你是乐队的副指挥，不是吗?”
Upon hearing this conflicting advice, I sank deeper into the ubiquity of a dark, engulfing abyss. Scratch that – too dramatic. But I was definitely confused. As a solution to my problem, I finally settled on a mini anthology of successful application essays that I had picked up in the local bookstore. To my dismay, however, the opening words of the book were, “There is no one foolproof method for writing a winning admissions essay.” As a matter of fact, “most of the advice you are given will contradict itself.” Great. Back to square one.
听到这个相互矛盾的建议后，我陷入了一个无处不在的黑暗深渊。划掉它们，太戏剧化了。但我确实很困惑。为了解决我的问题，我最终选择了一本我在当地书店里买到的成功申请论文的迷你选集。然而，令我沮丧的是，这本书的开场白是:“没有一种万无一失的方法可以写一篇成功的入学论文。”事实上，“你得到的大多数建议都会自相矛盾。”太好了。回到原点。
So over the next week (so much for a short sunny afternoon), I scrutinized the book, one great essay at a time. There were ones narrating vivid memories of remarkable events, and there were ones depicting personal tragedy handled with such strength and maturity. Of course, each piece was unique in its own way. Finding some common thread linking those literary jewels together was impossible, though I can’t say I didn’t try.
因此，在接下来的一个星期里(就这样度过了一个阳光明媚的短暂下午)，我仔细研读了这本书，一次读一篇精彩的文章。有些文章讲述了对重大事件的生动记忆，有些文章描绘了个人悲剧，都处理得如此有力和成熟。当然，每一件作品都有其独特之处。找到一些将这些文学珍宝联系在一起的共同线索是不可能的，尽管我不能说我没有尝试过。
My plan for the perfect essay went down the drain. It was back to the drawing board, as the cliché goes. Thus beaten before I even began, I started trying to capture my personality in roughly five hundred words. I wrote several essays, each covering some facet of who I am. Yet, none screamed out to me, “I’m the right essay, pick me!” Much as cells varied in function come together to produce synergy greater than the sum of its parts – me. It was then that I had an epiphany of sorts. The college essay isn’t an autobiography describing who I am; it is about being who I am.
我写一篇完美文章的计划泡汤了。正如老话所说，一切都回到了绘图板上。就这样，还没开写就被打败，我开始尝试用大约500个字来描述我的个性。我写了几篇文章，每一篇都涵盖了我的某些方面。然而，它们中没有谁向我尖叫，“我是正确的那篇，选我吧!”正如功能各异的细胞聚集在一起产生的协同作用大于其各部分的总和——我。就在那时，我有了某种顿悟。大学申请论文不是描述我是谁的自传;而是关于做我自己。
Now that I look at the college essay as something along the lines of a personal ad, it’s not nearly as daunting. Here is who I am: I’m five feet nine inches, with jet-black hair and deep mahogany eyes. I enjoy soccer, economics, and long walks on the beach gazing at a romantic sunset…Oops, wrong type of personal ad.
现在，我把大学申请论文看作是个人广告的一部分，它就不那么令人生畏了。这就是我:我身高5英尺9英寸，有着乌黑的头发和深红木色的眼睛。我喜欢足球、经济学，喜欢在沙滩上漫步，凝视浪漫的日落……哎呀，这是个错误的个人广告。
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