使用ChatGPT写留学文书全教程(2)

某主流媒体网站上登了一篇关于ChatGPT文书的文章。内容是针对Common App #5的写作,记者请了专业的Prompt Engineer,对这篇文书的Prompt做出优化设计,然后交由ChatGPT去写作。

Prompt: Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others.

文书完成后,有记者交给H大毕业、20年爬H顾问的AN来审读,并做出评论。你们愿意动手的,就自己去谷歌搜来这些人的身份。我在这里就不替他们做广告了。 以下是这篇ChatGPT写的、326 Words的文书。字数太短,因为是免费版ChatGPT 3.5的标准回应。

I remember standing under the spotlight at the local youth center, trembling, about to recite my first spoken word poem. I had no clue it would change my life.

Sure, I’d always liked writing. When I wasn’t nose-deep in “To Kill a Mockingbird” or jotting down research for my paper on redlining, I wrote little pieces. But this—this was different. The room was filled with kids from my block, a neighborhood crisscrossed with stories like powerlines. My mom, a nurse who’s seen her share of life, sat in the back. My dad and brother had to work but they texted me good luck emojis; that’s their way.

That night, I spoke about the hardship that our community faces. We’ve been scarred by financial instability, racial prejudice, and loss—my childhood friend Jayla was a casualty of that. She and I used to make mud pies in my backyard. I always pictured us growing up side by side, but life had other plans. My words poured out, a mix of pain, but also hope. When I finished, the room erupted into applause. The sound was healing. I stepped off the stage, having found my voice.

It wasn’t just the claps or the praise that followed. It was the conversations I started to have—with friends, teachers, even strangers. That night launched me into an active role in my community, organizing poetry nights and later using that platform to talk about issues like systemic racism, sparking dialogues we’d long ignored.

In sociology class, we learned theories about the impact of social issues. I decided to connect this knowledge with my passion for spoken word. I teamed up with my teacher and began an after-school club. It became an unexpected haven for kids to express, question, and grow. And in between planning, studying, and making time for my odd hobby of collecting vintage postcards, I finally found balance. My grades improved, my relationships strengthened, and I felt rooted.

以下是针对Chat GPT文书,顾问AN的五条评论。来看看吧:

“I remember standing under the spotlight at the local youth center, trembling, about to recite my first spoken word poem. I had no clue it would change my life.”

- 开头很好,有悬念感。(ChatGPT确实有能力模仿人来写作)

“I wrote little pieces.”

- 关于什么的短片?太模糊了。(Chat GPT不擅长写具体内容)

“I always pictured us growing up side by side, but life had other plans.“

- 故事结束很突兀(Chat GPT基本不会完成一个主题)。

“That night launched me into an active role in my community, organizing poetry nights and later using that platform to talk about issues like systemic racism, sparking dialogues we’d long ignored.“

- 这里,或者说文章中点处,我开始感到厌烦,它的文字从一个要点跳进另一个要点。(Chat GPT常常落笔突兀)

“…my odd hobby of collecting vintage postcards.”

- 明信片太突兀了。它们跟这篇主题有什么关系吗?(ChatGPT写细节往往与主题无关)

最后的,这篇的报道的记者,也是专业作家,给出的综合评估是:

ChatGPT的文章通常缺乏具体细节,导致文章在支持论点方面缺乏实证。它还常使用陈词滥调来解释情境,而不深入探讨作者的情感体验。它的文章通常重复而可预测,使读者缺乏惊喜和阅读感。Chat GPT在涉及种族、性别或社会经济地位等问题上生成的内容,通常会使用刻板印象。

一般人读了这篇从顾问、记者角度的文章,会关注到的是Chat GPT写申请文书的不利之处。然后,读者会得出用AI写文书很有风险,所以自己写文书的时候,还是不要AI了吧。这就是这篇专家视角的文章的目的。 也有一些读者,能提出更尖锐的问题。

比如,有人指出这篇评论与大学招生实际情况差异: “一个专家读一篇文章,他当然能判断的出来哪一篇是AI写的。我也能判断得出来。但是真的AO,每天平均读30篇文书,一个申请季读1000-2000篇文书,他还能读得准确哪一篇是AI作品吗?” 还有人,指出专家的个人偏见: “万一,在你(错误地)假定眼前的文章是AI写的以后,你还能(中立地)读出里面多少的好处呢?就像这篇ChatGPT文章,确实写得不错,不仅是他的开头,整篇立意也不错的。”

但,很少数的人会关注到,应该如何改进自己的技术能力,才能更自由、正确地使用ChatGPT来书写文书呢? 毕竟,有了电脑,你就要学会打字,谁还在坚持自己手填大学申请表呢? ChatGPT写作文书的短板,正是AN提到的几个问题。但顾问和记者反对AI写作,因为AI让他们丢掉本职工作。

我们,作为学生和家长,要学会怎样使用AI,才能写出跟顾问和记者一样好(也许更好)的文章来。下面,就来谈谈AI写作的短板。 第一个短板,只会开局,不会结局。

就比如上面这篇ChatGPT例文,他就有个充满悬念感的好开局,连AN专家都认可的。但结局却显得突兀。不仅仅开局故事的结束,落在了生活的阴差阳错上,而且整篇文章的就是一个不伦不类的明信片收集爱好。 第二个短板,价值堆砌,稀释主题。这就是AN 说的从一个要点跳到另一个要点。家庭财务困难、种族偏见、友谊缺失,然后就掌声响起来了,对自己却只是治愈。

这四个价值点,任意选一个去写清楚,都是好主意。都写出来,主题被稀释的荡然无存。 第三个短板,花式句型,结构复杂。这一点说的是AI语言的特点,AI毕竟可以自动保证语法正确。但它的弱点就是玩辞藻、造花句。分词作状语放在句尾,破折号细节隐身句意,排比句式烘托情绪,这三类句式是很有风格的写作方式,用来强调烘托但AI学会了就滥用了。在这篇20句的短文里,就有8句这样的句子,平均每段话里1.6句。

第四个短板,着重说明,不重讲述。这个是ChatGPT写文章最大的短板,这一篇例文,还是出于一个非常好的Promtp Engineer之手,才写得出这样不同一般的文章。其实,要能在Prompt里把说明和讲述区分开来对待的话,ChatGPT就能写出更好的文章了。 第五个短板,字数所限,需要调整。就像这篇报道给出的原文,只有327words,大概可以用于加州文书第7题,What have you done to make your school or your community a better place。

但用在Common App上,就显得短了点。 其实,这个好开局,是那位Prompt Engineer的功劳。改进你的Prompt,就自然能写出更好的文书。

下面,就是ChatGPT根据我的Prompt,从新改写的文字。这一版,开宗明义,主题明确,起承转合,结尾扣题,仅用319 Words,写给加州系就很好用了。

319 words

In the gentle glow of the local youth center's spotlight, a pivotal moment marked the commencement of a transformative journey, echoing not only within me but resonating throughout our community.

As an individual immersed in literature and writing, I lived in a neighborhood woven with stories reminiscent of powerlines. Despite my genuine passion for individual improvements, a sense of aimlessness pervaded in my growing up environment.

In the shared space of the youth center, I stepped forward, unknowingly initiating a shift in my life trajectory. Spoken words became a conduit to express our collective hardships—financial instability and racial prejudice. The applause that followed wasn't merely a validation of personal expression but the commencement of dialogues that had long been silenced.

Motivated by the resonance of that night, I transitioned into an active role within our community. Organizing poetry nights and using the platform to address systemic issues such as racism, I began to understand the intersection of my personal passion and societal change. A collaboration with a sociology teacher led to the establishment of an after-school club—an unexpected haven for expression, questioning, and growth.

Balancing academic pursuits and community involvement, I experienced personal growth. The after-school club became not just a space for artistic expression but also a conduit for academic improvement and the forging of stronger relationships.

In the tapestry of this journey, a profound sense of rootedness emerged. Strengthened relationships, improved grades, and a newfound sense of purpose converged to create a feeling of being firmly grounded. I found myself standing at the intersection of personal growth and community impact—a testament to the transformative power of embracing one's voice.

As I reflect on this journey of activism and self-discovery, I look forward with anticipation. This is not an endpoint but a beginning—a commitment to further contribute to our community, armed with the knowledge that the journey towards empowerment is a continuous, collective endeavor.

要想用于Common App,就需要提供更新的Prompt,提供一些具体的细节,要求ChatGPT为你再扩写一下到600 Words:

578words

In the quiet tension of the local youth center, an electric line of anticipation hummed through the air. A single line echoed my unspoken vulnerability: "I am Frank, a senior at Central High, I am here to share a story of a teen writer feeling lost in his community."

My journey unfurled in a community interwoven with stories, akin to powerlines tracing intricate patterns across the neighborhood. Amid the rhythm of everyday life, my affection for reading others’ and crafting my own essays on the local gazette became my refuge.

Every essay was a canvas where I sketched personal experiences, pursuing personal excellence by the conventional metrics. Each achievement, a brushstroke in the masterpiece of societal expectations. Yet, in the shadow of supposed success, I found myself increasingly at sea, navigating the labyrinth of decaying education.

The turning point manifested in the opportunity to stand before the youth center audience. The stage transformed into a confessional, where I laid bare the pain woven into our community's fabric—financial instability and loss of community commitment to education. In the revelation of my own vulnerabilities, I discovered a profound resonance with others who bore similar burdens.

Motivated by the catharsis of that transformative night, I metamorphosed into active roles within the community. Orchestrating poetry nights and engaging with systemic issues, the uttered words became a catalyst for tangible change. Collaborating with a sociology mentor birthed an after-school haven—a space where personal expression, questioning, and growth flourished in unison.

Juggling academic pursuits and community immersion became a delicate act on life's tightrope. Yet, within this intricate balancing act, personal evolution bloomed. The once mere artistic enclave of the after-school club morphed into a conduit for academic advancement and the forging of meaningful connections.

In the complex weave of this journey, an unyielding sense of rootedness emerged. Strengthened relationships, elevated grades, and a rekindled sense of purpose converged to create a bedrock beneath my feet. Standing at the juncture of personal metamorphosis and community resonance, I felt empowered by the alchemy of embracing one's voice.

Harnessing the community center and my writing club, I spearheaded a student campaign advocating for a district referendum in the past one and half year. Engaging in community discussions on child education, shedding light on the dilapidated state of local school facilities, and rallying recent high school graduates to return home for the vote, our collective efforts sparked a remarkable transformation of my experience and the community.

Two rounds of voting in 18 months, we successfully shifted the tides from a discouraging 30-70 against school funding to an uplifting 55-45 majority in favor of $150M new funding to our local schools.

This triumph not only reflected a profound shift in community sentiment but also marked a tangible commitment to investing in education. In two years from now, a state-of-the-art pool, a new evergreen turfed football field, and the cutting-edge science labs, will host the Central High students in their after-school passions. Beginning next fall, brand-new personal Chromebooks will level off our education inequality for every student in the district.

As the narrative circles back upon itself, I find myself at the cusp of infinite possibilities, reflecting on a journey steeped in activism and self-discovery. Rooted in the community, armed with spoken word, I peer into the future with eager anticipation. The conclusion is not a finite point but a commencement—a pledge to perpetually contribute to our community, cognizant that empowerment is an ongoing, collective venture.

从上面的两篇例子,你能看出来Prompt Engineering有多重要。一个好的文书老师,可以分分钟调教ChatGPT写出一篇合适的文书来。 但关键还不在此处。 想让ChatGPT帮你写出好的文书来,关键在于你必须有经验、有眼光,还有心情,能从你的经历中看出可能有的故事来。 以上这两篇,看着觉得好吧。

但,它们都不是一个Prompt就成的,更不是到此为止就可以上交了的。   跟ChatGPT合作,你还要Step By Step循序渐进。一个AGI,还不能跟你贴心到像了你肚里的蛔虫。如果你肚里养得起蛔虫的话。 想让ChatGPT帮你写出好的文书来,关键还在于,你还要有经验、有眼光,看出什么样的文字才是更好。

 

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